Score: 10

"Man, I am trippin' out. [751.5]"

submission: [CD09] Creaking Jodphurs

date: August 15, 2009

I've seen some epilepsy flashes today, and I've seen some good ones and some bad ones. Main thing is... I've seen SOME. Today. And... well, this one blows 'em all away.

I'll leave it at that.

Signing off, from beyond the grave, apparently....
teh gfox

Score: 9

"Hahahah... ohhhh yeah, that's the stuff. [750.8]"

submission: LL - Erectin' a Dispenser

date: July 27, 2009

You may think it didn't turn out as funny as the concept, and that may be the case.... but it's so much funnier than 9 out of 10 youtube "TF2 characters making sexy time" type vids, so... yeah.

One thing that disappointed me, though: When I saw yourtitle in the under judgement stack tonight, I figgered your flash was gonna feature the great "Dispenser Erectin'" song from NG's own audio portal. Check it out if you haven't, maybe it'll further inspire you: http://www.newgrounds.com/audio/liste n/199958

And um... yeah, more video woulda been nice, but engie/heavy voiceclip and editing-wise, it was good from start to finish. Nice trim of "incoming" to be just... well... COMING. Heh. And... neato EngieLock design. If you were to do a follow-up or remake or sequel, I'd recommend just designing a lock for all of the other 7 classes, even if they don't have speaking parts. They can always stand around in the background with looks of horror (or interest) while heavy and engie do their thang. Or run by on the way to the next capture point or something. :::shrugs::: I'd give us more to look at is all. Good job, keep the TF2 schtuff iiiiiiiiiincomin'!

Score: 8

"Good L4Dy stuff, mate!"

submission: L4D Short: Starring Louis

date: July 14, 2009

Always love to see new L4D/TF2/HL2/Portal stuff on the portal. Anyway, I thought your stick style was decent (there's good stickflash and there's bad stickflash, just as with anything, of course), and I didn't even think about the fact that Louis's stick figureness was white until I read the first page of reviews from when you first submitted... all mentioning it. I DID notice Zoey was red, but how could you not notice an all-red stick suddenly appearing? Heh.

Anywho, a couple things: I know you explained in a response on the 2nd page of reviews (because I was specifically back there looking for the answer) that the reason Louis drops the M-16 is that he's out of ammo, but... based on the L4D mechanics, there's gonna be an ammo pile coming up sooner or later, so why would he throw away even an empty primary weapon? You didn't address that, but I figure either A) you were going for realism (like Valve does with their Meet the... videos... to a certain extent: see Meet the Spy's friendly fire mode being on)... or B) you wanted him to have no primary weapon for when No Mercy starts (if that was supposed to be Zoey and Louis meeting up for the first time, and then they'll meet Bill and Francis shortly thereafter).

But wait... in the L4D intro movie, they all have primaries... ack, whatever. Heh.

Re: the L4D2 boycott: I understand it, I would prefer they wait a little longer than 363 days in between the original and the sequel, too (and hell, release some HL2:ep3 and Portal 2 in the meantime, also! Where the heck are they? ;_;), but I'm not gonna outright boycott it. I got L4D1 as a Christmas present, much as I got the Orange Box for my birthday a year ago, but IIRC it was $5 off on amazon.com, meaning $45. There's no way I'm gonna pay over say $30 for L4D2, so I'll just wait till Valve puts it down to 50% off in one of their huge megasales.

Score: 10

"Zekey sappin' mah spy! [750.6]"

submission: spies came out of water

date: February 25, 2009

It's pretty rare I'm on top of the portal enough to see a ZSL flash when it's fresh, but amazingly I have... and amazingly, it's about TF2, the very thing consuming much of my time and keeping me away from the Portal/NG in general since June 2008, which is when I got the Orange Box. #;-}>

Loved it. It was like a surreal Ren&Stimpy version of 2fort dramas mixed with a weird Coldplay song I've never heard before. Loved the slow motion SG sappin', engie backstabbin', and nade/rocket/baseball dodgin'... ENGIEVENGE, as I like to call it, was then attained. Man, next time I play 2fort, I'll think of the true drama at hand. The crazy and lonely-looking demo dumping stickies in the sewer pipes.... the soldier alertly alerting folks to spyification... the multiple pyros running around with their flare guns out instead of their flamethrowers... and the spies giving out TREACHEROUS HUGS.

The really funny part is that engie probably accepted a hug from an engie with HIS USERNAME. Poor, dumb engie. "Cause they're all spies...."

Score: 10

"Ah, my old friend JujubeLock [751.4]"

submission: US Senate doesn't care

date: December 30, 2008

I remember the old glory days of HNT, and though I don't see every flash you make or take part in a collab for... I do see your name grace the portal entries I happen to watch every now and then (way down from a few years ago, alas).

But this? Ah, this is a masterpiece to make me nostalgic for those old days.

I used to play this song and others at my college radio station, the Wesley Willis alone is total win. And I was just reading an article from GoogleNews about the plight of the 71 year old black dude the Illinois legislature and the US Senate democrats are both pre-judging. Simply sad.

Of course, it could be that ol' Blago didn't mention this guy's name during any of the federally wiretapped phone calls just so he could then appoint him and get some kickback and somehow be above suspicion... but then that would mean he knew he was being taped and... yeah, why not just avoid saying the things he said then, eh?

So this dude looks clean to me. Plus, he's SEVENTY-FREAKING-ONE. He'll be dead soon, he isn't looking to get elected to multiple terms, he'll just serve this partial term and then the next election can give someone else a turn, most likely.

Chicago Politics taking itself too seriously FTL. ROCK OVER LONDON, ROCK ON CHICAGO.

Oh, but just as an aside... does anyone besides Wesley think people flock to McDonalds to... "rock out"? O_O They will indeed put pounds on you there, though. :::nods::: More of a Wendy's guy myself.

Score: 9

"I think most "offended" folks... [751]"

submission: 911 day

date: September 11, 2008

... are only offended because of the "Happy 911 Everyone" title screen you put up. And of course its partner "Happy 911 Day!" at the end (if they bothered to watch the whole thing). Nicely effective troll bookends there to cap both ends of your flash, my good man!

That MUST be the reason people are finding this offensive, after all... Because how on Earth the flash in between those "Happy Disaster!" greeting card moments is offensive to Americans (which both the people crying and giving you a 0... AND the people who are like "OMG, IT'S OFFENSIVE TO AMERICANS, I LOVE IT!" agree upon! THEY'RE IN TOTAL AGREEMENT ON AT LEAST ONE THING, WOW!)... I don't understand at all.

This flash shows the twin towers as arrogant, upper-class snobs... kind of like Frasier and Niles Crane on SPEED... and then the airplane as like an... uh... upper-middle-class, wannabe-rich gatecrasher who decides to give 'em what they deserve.

TWO TALKING BUILDINGS AND A TALKING AIRPLANE, FOLKS. It doesn't feature any HUMANS (American or otherwise)... or even any DEVILS (OMG, terrorist aliens/robots/monsters/________... cause they can't be human, see... humans don't fuck over other humans, do they?).

Newgrounds was built upon flashes 10x as offensive as this. You fucking pussies. Epic fail.

As to the flash itself (yes, finally): Loved it. I was expecting so much crap today on a 9/11 anniversary (yeah, that'll be every 9/11 from now on, of course!... 2 days before my gf's birthday, too... lovely... every year now...)... and most of the stuff was confirming my expectations... so when I opened up this flash in particular and saw the North and South towers speaking in a haughty manner, and apparently joking about how ol' Empire State is smaller than them and all... I couldn't get enough.

Of course, midway through on my first go'round... I just assumed that at any moment two airplanes were going to smash into them... either together, or one tower first (witness the shocked, indignant reaction of the other tower to his comrade's injury!) and then the second tower... but when instead the pissed-off plane took 'em both out in a spectacular flame+smoke+bloodfest at the end, it took me by surprise a bit.

So.... Well done. Kudos! I'd score it a 9.11... but... yeah. Close enough.

P.S. only one of the towers had a skyscraper dick... er.... antenna, I mean... on top.</anal nitpick mode> ARE YOU IMPLYING THEY WERE UPPER-CLASS *GAY* FOLK BY GIVING EACH OF THEM AN ANTENNA?!?! (gasp)

Score: 10

"I may be fickle, aye... [750.3]"

submission: Cunt Coffee

date: September 1, 2008

But I'm no tosser, you hear me?!!?

Anyway.

Your flash made me very thirsty for some coffee. I switched from a massive Coke habit (that'd be the cola...) to a massive coffee habit (10 cup carafe a day) back in June, and I've just finished my Labour Day pot o' coffee. I'll have to go and brew another pot. Hmmm... the full 10 cups again? Oy...

So yes... thank you for your valuable service to my day there. APPRECIATED MUCHLY. </review, as requested/demanded/whatnot>

Score: 10

"Epicness Squared [748]"

submission: [cd08] a clock day story

date: August 21, 2008

Seriously, how does your CD08 submission have a score that's 0.65 lower than your CD07 submission's score, anyway?

SO MUCH MORE CONTENT THIS TIME AROUND. #;-}>

And I'm proud to be the only reviewer (so far). Hey, only 6 days late this time, too. Instead of... 371 days late, like last year!

One note about the story: Lack of lovers and too many haters is one thing, yes... but who can blame teh morans for wanting some cash money for themselves, eh? It's only natural.

Mmmm. Sonne. Say no more.

AvocadoClock is featured in far too few Clock flashes and Clock pics. Correct me if I'm wrong, but the official NG "Clock Day side banners" don't show him prominently (if at all... maybe he's in the background behind like three other layers of far lesser clocks, IMO).

THIS IS A TRAVESTY.

NEVER FORGET.

Score: 8

"The year-overdue flash review... [747.2]"

submission: [CD07] zomg clockday

date: August 21, 2008

For you, teh jonthomsony one. I seriously made a shortcut of this flash of yours last Clock Day, while racking up 500+ saves on a 1600+ submission CD07 funfest... in which I didn't do any reviewing. I shortcutted a lot of movies that day. 50 or so, I think. I only ended up reviewing around 10 of 'em.

I FINALLY FIX OVERSIGHT NOW (hey... every day is Clock Day)...

"B! Happy clockday NGers!"

Right back atcha, jt. #;-}>

Score: 9

"OMG, I'm review #5 on both flashes today! [747]"

submission: The Very Best of Bahamut

date: August 15, 2008

Only Coop and Odyssic have reviews both of 'em so far. I CAN'T BELIEVE I'M REVIEWING FRESH BAHA-FLASH FOR ONCE. Huzzah.

OMG, moar free Dr. Pepper from the Coke machine.

OMG, Zidane... OMG, death metal parody... OMG upsidedownIdon'trememberwhatthat'sfro m... OMG Futurama reference... OMG Wade Fulp? ... OMG purple News Reporter.... OMG Multi-mut. OMG Afro+Graham.

Dude, the moments were fast and furious, and they were indeed some of the best, but... I think the editing was a bit abrupt. Then again, it IS Clock Day. Fast and furious editing is probably the way to go or else you won't hold anyone's attention today. So if this flash is mostly for today's audience... perfect. If it's for posterity... then... you should slow down the pacing and put in some more moments and do more slow fades and edits and less quick cuts.

THE POWER IS YOURS.

Sadly, the power wasn't mine this morning. I didn't get a save on either of your two flashes, because I ended up taking a 90 minute break from the constant saving I've been doing for around... 10 hours straight now (I had to... I have to stay sane so I can keep going without sleep, yanno? I have only some Mexican Coca-Cola and Maxwell House fresh portal-strained coffee to keep me going).

In fact, in the past couple of hours I missed 15-20 saves in a row (bringing me up to around 40 saves missed since the 15th began on the east coast... and 2 more I tried to blam with gfoxclock but were saved nonetheless), but none were more painful to miss than the 2 you submitted. Still, at least I have the other 250+ saves I did pick up to make me feel better. YAY!

P.S. If I could, I'd give this a 9.9 for your 99th... but I can't. I'm rounding down to preserve the 9ness, though.

P.P.S. I may introduce some Guinness along with the Coke and Coffee. Tell Father Jack for me, okay? If I pass out, I may need his assistance.